Inspiration

Enough with the SACRIFICE already!

I’m going on a rampage here so get ready. I am SICK of hearing EVERYONE say, “you have to be willing to sacrifice if you want to get ahead.” I hear lots of people in our organizations say, “We are looking for and rewarding those officers who are making the biggest sacrifices.” Well, I say, “That explains a lot.” If you are looking for mediocrity and status quo, asking for “sacrifice” is the surest way to get it. If, however, you are looking for motivated individuals who are ready to take on the toughest challenges for the long haul, what you really want is “Gift.” Here’s why:

Reason 1: “Sacrifice” assumes limited resources!

Sacrifice means giving from a place of limited resources. Therefore, by definition, at some point there will be nothing left to give. Whether you are considering the productivity of a team inside an organization, the emotional resilience of a family unit, or the physical stamina of an individual, at some point the entity will give out. The sacrifice has drained the reserves. There is nothing left to sacrifice.

Gift, on the other hand, assumes giving from a place of abundance, of overflow, of extra. By definition, the overflow does not get depleted. Every person has their own GIFTS, that collection of knowledge, skills, abilities, talents, desires, experiences and quirks that are unique to them. When each person uses their GIFTS, the supply is constantly renewed. It does not end.

Reason 2: “Sacrifice” hurts!

Sacrificing is painful, stressful, uncomfortable, and difficult. Therefore, people must be “convinced” to sacrifice. The perceived reward must be sufficient to warrant the discomfort and pain associated with the sacrifice. Unfortunately, no outside party can quantify the pain level of a given sacrifice so the “reward” is never enough. In short order, the one making the sacrifice begins to feel unappreciated, unrecognized, and resentful. They will certainly not entertain the notion of sacrificing a second time. “Find some other sucker!”

Giving does not hurt. In fact, it feels AMAZING! It’s like a drug. When a person uses his natural GIFTS, he does not need any outside reward. The reward comes in the true satisfaction and fulfillment of authentically being in service to the world. I once had an interview where I was asked, “Have you ever made any sacrifices in your life?” I thought for a long moment before I answered the question. What I said was, “Yes, I’m sure I did. But it didn’t feel like it at the time.” I realize now that I had NOT sacrificed. I had GIVEN freely and generously. And was eager to do so again.

Reason 3: Sacrifice requires time to refill and recharge!

Because sacrifice depletes resources, when the well is empty, it requires time to refill and recharge. The amount of time and resources required to refill the well varies depending on the nature of the sacrifice and how many times it has been drained dry in the past.

Given the challenges and responsibilities facing our public institutions today, THERE IS NO TIME to recharge. We must continue moving forward as fast as we can just to keep up.

Because giving does not deplete resources, it does not require recharging. The act of giving is inherently self-sustaining, as the reward comes in the act itself. Some people will read this statement and think, “Well, if we operate this way, no one will ever do the hard jobs or take the tough assignments.” What those people don’t realize is that the “hard job” is NOT HARD for the one ideally suited to fill it. For every assignment there is someone for whom the assignment is IDEAL. ALWAYS. Here is the key: Only the one GIFTed for the role knows that it is IDEAL for them. No other outside party can make that determination.

A Final consideration:

We’ve been conditioned to believe that the value of a contribution is directly related to the level of pain (sacrifice) involved in making the contribution. Viewed from the above perspective, the opposite is true. For one week, try shifting the mindset to: the value of a contribution is directly related to the level of satisfaction (gift) it provides both the giver and receiver. Notice what happens.

The Leadership Tool Most Leaders Are Scared to Use…

By Martha Wilson

As a Leadership Engineer and full time federal employee, I live in the same world as the people I most want to serve and support. And for the past few weeks, it has been a real challenge.

For those of you who are familiar with my work, you know that I focus on the idea that when you are doing the work that you are ideally suited to do, the work that takes advantage of your highest “gifts,” (skills, abilities, talents, experiences and desires) your unique natural leadership abilities will come out on their own to be gently tweaked and refined according to the needs of your role and your mission. Well, I confess, recently I was having a hard time believing what I teach. In one instance I’d worked for hours on a project only to have it completely ignored. When I approached my supervisor to ask if he had questions or concerns because he hadn’t moved it along, he simply said, “it isn’t on my priority list right now.” About the same time I learned that my organization had recently changed their policy on tour extensions (something they frequently do but usually provide some generous loopholes), and this time there would be no consideration for extensions and no opportunity for discussion. These highlights were cherries on top of a new unit chief who was “in the shorts” of the first line managers to the point that they were refusing to exercise any initiative without specific instruction for fear of being reprimanded or second-guessed. (Does this sound familiar to any of you, or am I the only one who ever experiences this?)

At the same time that I am feeling all of the frustration, disappointment, anger, physical fatigue, headache and muscle tension of working in that situation, I was also coaching clients. Specifically encouraging them to notice how they were feeling (mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually) because those feelings were indicators of alignment and clues to their best next steps. Yet I couldn’t seem to do it for myself. I felt like a hypocrite, a liar, and a fraud. (Not a really good operating place for a leader, an employee, or a coach.)

That said, there are a few things I know without question:

Life, especially the Conscious Leader’s life, is not a flat road. Frankly, it is a road through the Himalayas. There are awe-inspiring peaks and deep, dark, cold valleys. You can’t have one without the other.
Every truly successful leader has a coach through whom the leader has committed to invest in himself. Sometimes the coach GUIDES the leader through the Himalayas, and sometimes the coach ALLOWS the leader to find her own way.
Not every problem can or should be FIXED. Some problems, much like a virus, just need to run their course.

My coach was deliberately “allowing” me to find my own way through an unrelated problem when I suddenly realized that I had the solution to both problems. The solution was the one leadership tool that most leaders are scared…absolutely terrified…to use. The tool is called Stop Pushing. Just stop.

Throughout our careers we’ve been taught that influencing others and having an impact on the mission is the hallmark of our success. We go to classes to learn to set goals and develop action plans to achieve those goals. We then take additional classes to learn to manage our time and increase our productivity. In a different venue we learn that we should be happy and positive all the time so when we don’t feel that way, we push ourselves to “fix our attitude.” We learn to push and push and PUSH. The one thing that we don’t learn is WHEN TO STOP PUSHING! What is astounding is that when we strategically learn to STOP PUSHING and allow ourselves to be PULLED, potentially in a direction that we might have initially judged as inappropriate, we see opportunities that never existed before. Instead of resisting our efforts, exactly the right people become our partners, and everything that was impossible before becomes easy.

I should warn you that this is an advanced level tool. That’s why most leaders are too scared to use it. There is a big difference between abdicating your responsibility or “selling your soul to the devil” and strategically choosing to allow yourself to be pulled. The art comes in knowing exactly what that difference is and when to use the tool. These past few weeks were the reminder that I needed to take my own medicine and STOP PUSHING.

“I don’t want your sacrifice, I need your gift.” Signed, A Grateful Nation

By Martha Wilson

This article was originally published in July 2012.

Those who come to federal service are a special breed. We come out of a call to service, a desire to give back, an intent to leave the world a better place than we found it. As we come on board with our respective organizations we expect, and are even eager, to make certain sacrifices in the service of our agency and our country. Most of our organizations have the word sacrifice somewhere in the either our Vision, Mission or Values statements.

I believe that sacrifice is the one thing that we do NOT need, or even want, from our federal employees. Before you label me a heretic, a traitor, or someone looking collect more for less, hear me out. Sacrifice means giving of oneself from a place of scarcity or lack. Whether that giving is in terms of money, time, energy, or physical well-being, it assumes a giving, willingly or otherwise, from a source that has finite boundaries. Because of those finite boundaries, at some point there will be nothing left to give. The cup is empty. We simply cannot pour out any more. When that cup is empty, we are left tired, bored, frustrated, depressed, and wondering, “why did I sacrifice so much in the first place? Did everything I gave up really even matter?”

So what if instead of asking federal employees to sacrifice, we instead asked them to give? What’s the difference? The difference is that a gift comes from a place of abundance, even excess. Thankfully, each of us is truly unique. We have different talents, skills, abilities, and loves that come together to create who we are as people and as employees. As we cultivate each of those things within ourselves beginning with the things that matter most to us, we continually fill our cup. Our service is no longer a “pouring out” of finite resources but rather a “spilling over” of unlimited abundance doing what we love in the service of those who love what we do.

While there are steps that organizations can take to facilitate the process (a different topic for a different day), the creation of an engaged, on purpose, abundant work force, is not up to the organization. It is up to us as individuals to create that reality for ourselves. We are the individuals who protect our borders, who create the face of our nation abroad, who insure that our veterans, our elderly, and our under-privileged are cared for, who insure that our nation’s fiscal resources are managed responsibly, who preserve our natural lands, and who perform countless other roles creating a nation that, while not perfect, we believe is the best deal going. When we recognize the enormity of our endeavor, we realize that it is impossible for us to sacrifice enough to face the challenges ahead of us. The only way that we can sustain our missions for the long haul is to give, of our time, energy, talent, and love, from our individual overflow.

So what does it mean to give from our individual overflow? The answer might sound counterintuitive…or worse self-serving. It means being absolutely clear on what matters most to you, what makes your heart sing, and consistently choosing in favor of that. As you begin to focus on those things that you are good at, that bring you joy, that make you smile, you will find yourself naturally led to the place where your specific gifts are of highest service. Your gifts will spill over on to the work you do, the people you work with, and the people who mean the most to you both personally and professionally. There will be no limit to your time, your energy, your creativity, or your possibilities because you are giving from abundance. Contrary to popular belief, you not only deserve to love your work, you have a responsibility to.

So as you drive to work this morning, check in with yourself. Are you excited and looking forward to getting to work? If not, imagine just for a minute what it might feel like if you were. What would be different for you? What would be different for those around you? Then make a choice.

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If your “government service” is starting to feel more like “government servitude,” Leadership Architect Martha Austin will show you innovative yet simple shifts to transform the bureaucracy you hate into the mission you love so you can make more money, have more fun, and contribute more to the world. Get more FREE tips at www.freegiftfrommartha.com.

3 Key Elements to BE the Change

By Martha Wilson

Mahatma Ghandi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” We’ve all heard that a thousand times. Yet have you ever stopped to consider the implications of truly BEING the change? For the Conscious Leader, BEING the change is a tall order, and it requires 3 key elements that may not be immediately obvious. These elements, while difficult for some to master, are the building blocks for the Conscious Leader.

Key Element 1: The Conscious Leader is Open to Change. As leaders we often say that our organization needs to change this or that. So we gather data that demonstrates to the organization how its current way of being is ineffective and how being different would “improve” it. We begin a campaign to make the organization be open to change whether it wants to or not.

The Conscious Leader realizes that in order for the organization to be open to change, the leader himself must be open to change…open to seeing things differently. Interestingly, organizations are composed of …well…individual humans. In order for the organization to change, the individual humans inside the organization must be open to change. The individual humans must be open to evolution and growth not only within the construct of the organization but throughout the larger realm of their lives. As the Conscious Leader develops his own personal openness to change and growth, the organization around him becomes open to change and growth.

Key Element 2: The Conscious Leader does not waste energy DOING the change. Many organizations spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on employee engagement surveys. The results come back indicating that engagement is lower than desired, and employees complain about feedback, assignment and promotion processes, and evaluation systems. So organizations institute classes on feedback and career development, mandate review processes, and track the number of conversations that supervisors have with employees. A year later they do another survey and discover that the results have not changed. What happened? The members of the organization wasted time, energy and money DOING the change, not BEING it.

The Conscious Leader recognizes that BEING must come BEFORE DOING. The difference is very subtle and very powerful. Providing feedback and career development conversations will not create an organization with highly engaged employees. DOING the change. Rather an organization with highly engaged employees will automatically provide helpful feedback and develop powerful career development processes that work for everyone. The Conscious Leader knows that the only way to create an organization composed of highly engaged employees is to become one himself…BEFORE asking or expecting it of others. BEING the change.

Key Element 3: The Conscious Leader does not WAIT ON change. This may be the most difficult element of all. It can be easy to say, “This job will get better when I get a [newsupervisor/budget/office/the regs change/my husband’s job lets us move]. When [that thing] happens, I will have a job I love. Until then I’ll tolerate things as they are.” News Flash: When you tolerate a job that does not make your heart sing, you cannot offer your highest and best self. Yes, you may work very hard, and you will be doing the best that you can…in that situation. But it will NOT be the best that you are truly capable of. With each day that goes by, you will sell a larger piece of your soul for the sake of a paycheck. In some cultures, they call that prostitution.

The Conscious Leader does not wait for things to change around her. She acknowledges that the change she seeks is already inside her and makes choices, large and small, in support of the change. She acts AS IF the change she wanted has already happened…AS IF she already has a boss she loves (and interacts with the current one in that manner); AS IF she already has the new office (and maintains the old one accordingly). As she consistently chooses in favor of those things that are most aligned with the world she wants to see, she BECOMES the change.

Would you like to use this article in your newsletter or ezine? You can so long as you include the complete blurb below:

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